NBA Draft Night

Interesting night, thus far, in New York.

Without any surprise and much to the love of conspiracy theorists everywhere, Kyrie the toe Irving was selected by Cleveland at number 1 overall. There's certianly some merit to the conspiracy theory regarding him. It is rather amazing that the year after Cleveland get's LeBroned they end up with the number one pick. While Kyrie certainly seems to be an NBA All Star and a boost to wallets of podiatrists in the Cleveland area, this is nowhere near the biggest warranted conspiracy in sports.

How about in 2005 when the NHL was returning from a lock out and were busy trying to explain why hockey would work on the Outdoor Life Network? The NHL, and rightfully so, did a true lottery for the picks. With all the rule changes in the upcoming season, no one really knew who would be good that year as proved by Carolina and Buffalo meeting in the Eastern conference after being predicted to finish last and next to last, respectively, at the start of the season.

Pittsburgh was the lucky team that year winning the first overall pick. The Penguins at the time were a complete disaster. Not only were they terrible, the Igloo was becoming the Trash Can and the team was ready to move to Kansas City. Luckily, local hockey legend and probably the second best hockey player of all time Super Mario Lemeuix was interested in purchasing the team and would save the team and lead them to the Cup in the next few season.

Well that and their draft pick from that "random" lottery - Sidney Crosby.

And if you want to talk conspiracy in the NBA with Cleveland, how about Cleveland getting the first pick when LeBron was coming to the league. The biggest can't miss since Coke Zero, LeBron not only had mega celebrity MVP written all over him, he came from Ohio.

Of course, both the NHL and NBA use a non traditional draft with the worst teams not guaranteed the first pick. This prevents tanking but promotes silly conspiracies that really are nothing more than coincidence like the three mentioned here.

Other things I've noted tonight is how friendly everyone has been. It's so sweet that teams are drafting for each other and holding hands. When Norris Cole debuts in Miami, maybe he should have Kum By Yah as his entrance music - kinda like each individual hitter does in MLB. He was drafted by Chicago for Minnesota. Then Miami drafted some kid from Bosnia for Minnesota so they could get Cole. Awww. So sweet we are all getting along!

And what is up with all these international players? At first I thought I was maybe a day in the future watching the NHL draft. Of course this in reality has nothing to with the talent across the pond but rather the lack of talent in college basketball this past season. Let's not forget that when everyone was illegally (and probably breaking many rules of their employers) filling out brackets in March, no one could consistently pick a champion. "What a tournament this will be!" the heads at ESPN proclaimed. I get that 10 teams are evenly matched, but when your match up is B minus play, then whatever. I guess the only comment I have is Fran Freschella is going to hold out for more money next year. Holy crap I'm tired of hearing this guy and watching videos of players shot from hand held cameras and streaming from youtube from a Nigerian account who still needs your help with that currency transaction.

My worst move of the night goes to my local Charlotte Bobcats. MJ certainly was magic on the court but the magic he creates as an owner is much larger. Maybe it should be called black magic as he has once again proved that big name athletes are terrible coaches and GMs.

While on that subject, I once heard Charles Barkely, when he wasn't contemplating switching his golf swing to the left side of the ball (which as a lefty golfer, I highly advise), give his opinion why this was the case. Guys let Gretzky, Jordan, Bird and other failures as coaches / owners / GMs went to levels no one could match on their playground of choice in their prime. They just knew they had to put whatever "it" is into gear. That was the way their teams played - just get it to the guy, he will take care of it. Not many Michael Jordans on the Charlotte Bobcats. I certainly don't remember seeing anyone from anywhere near French Lick on the Pacers. Phoenix almost went bankrupt, much less had anything close to 99.

So MJ makes a great trade and sends overrated and overpaid and very common named Steven Jackson away and grabs another top 10 pick. So far so good Black Magic. And you also snag Corey Maggette. Ok, we get it, you like UNC and Duke players. But he's a solid player.

With this pick, clearly addressing a terrible draft decision from the years before, you pass up on to me the biggest need in Charlotte, a scoring point guard and future all star (and maybe rookie of the year) Brandon Knight. And who do you get? A septlingual high pitched version of Mutumbo. This allows Detroit to grab Knight and then, uh oh, here comes number 9. Wait, you still need a point gaurd. Guess we will have to get ole chin hair himself, Kimba Walker.

Drafting whatever the dude from Congo's name is at 7 and having a pick at 9 means you both really wanted him AND you thought the team at 8, Detroit, would grab him. If your plan was Makhtar Ndiaye's twin and a PG, why not get the Knight at 7? With Buckwheat Wallace on Detroit, do you really think they want another big man who can't score?

Of course this all relates to two terrible draft decision. MJ passed up on Rudy I'm not Gay to get Dirty Sanchez himself Adam Morrison. And then he passes up on Brook Lopez when the team CLEARLY needed a big man and you get DJ Augustine. While Augustine is a good player, Ray Felton was on the roster and really didn't need someone like Augustine behind him. And how about Alexis Ajinca. Yeah, he's been a huge help. Guys like Serge Ibaka, George Hill and Mario Chalmers were all around at the time. Of course MJ broke rule one. Never draft a dude with a girls name when someone with the name Serge is around.

And like normal at the NBA draft, the move of the night goes to the Spurs. Want to know why this team is so good? They draft good. Throw the Duncan move out because the only reason they got him was a ping pong ball landed right a season after David Robinson, who signs every autograph with a Bible verse, was out for the year. Gionobli, Parker and many other picks all homegrown Spurs draft picks. What do they do tonight? They get Kawhi Leonard from the Aztecs. This guy can flat out play and enters a perfect situation in San Antonio where they don't need him, but will certianly add depth to one the best franchises in sports over the last 20 years.

My haha moment of the draft goes to the Detroit Pistons drafting Mr. Softie and twin brother of a raptor, Kyle Singler. Look, I get it. The guy is soft but he can hit the step back jump...wait, no he can't. This guy will be a huge NBA bust. In fact, the only thing I can think that is good about him being drafted is the economic impact it will have on US Economy. That's right. I said it. He's so ugly and so awful, no one in Detroit will want to go see him play. Then these guys will get bored and go back to work. They then fix the automotive industry. I guess all that basketball Obama played was in fact part of this master plan - the Singler Stimulas plan.

That's all I got tonight. I'm sure more will come later. Keep coming back. If you must.